Why The Alchemy of Intimacy?

Why is this blog called the Alchemy of Intimacy? Because I like the way it sounds? Yes, but I could also call it the Alchemy of Romance, or the Alchemy of Relationships, because they all fit and would mean the same thing.

Alchemy refers to change, as in changing from a base state of being to a higher state of being.

Intimacy is a strong feeling of connection to another, not just to a lover, but to the world around us.

I’m talking about relationships and their power to transform us. Each encounter we have with another being is an intimate relationship by the nature of its immediacy. Whether it’s your most intimate relationship with your lover, or the relationship you experience for a fleeting moment with a sales clerk, they all have the power to transform the individuals involved. They shape our lives and give us countless opportunities to express and explore who we really are.

A sales clerk? Really? Yes, really. Recently I was standing in line at the grocery store with my darling daughter waiting for our turn to be checked out. I noticed that the sales clerk looked a little down and out, a bit tired and a tad on the down side from happy. I whispered to my daughter that it was going to be my goal to give the sales clerk a reason to smile. As she began checking out my groceries, I began chatting with her, the usual small talk. I made sure to make eye contact, keep a smile on my face and in my voice, and I asked her sincerely how she was doing. I commented that she must get tired checking out groceries all day and that I appreciated her assistance. She smiled, really smiled, and thanked me for noticing. In that moment we created an alchemy of intimacy. We each gave and received and choose to express our highest selves (highest self at that given moment).

With each new encounter you get to choose if you will act or react. Only in the scared moment of NOW can you choose who you want to be.  You can’t decide to be nice and smile at the sales clerk after the moment has passed. It’s passed, done, no do overs. You can decide to be nicer and smile next time, but you can’t go back to the moment that has passed.

I’ve been a foreign exchange trader for many years. It’s common practice to confirm a trade by saying “Done.” And every foreign exchange trader knows, Done is Done. A true professional does not renege, does not ask for a do-over or claim she was “just kidding”, not if she wants to survive in the business.

And so it is with life and relationships. Done is Done. Don’t take anyone or any moment for granted. With each new encounter you get to think, choose and do. Go out and do your best, that’s all anyone can do. And with each new encounter, experience the alchemy of intimacy.

So, tell me, have you had any good intimate encounters lately??

Enjoy always, T

Taking Risks v2

The greatest risk is to take no risk at all.

I believe we can all come up with times in our lives when this has proven to be true. I’d love to hear yours. I have one that sits high on my list. Let me share it with you.

A couple of years ago, my daughter and I were taking a two week vacation in Italy and Greece. We started out by flying to the Philadelphia where we would catch  a connecting flight to Rome. Due to lighting storms on the east coast our flight from San Francisco was delayed and we missed our connection. It was about 3:00 in the morning when we finally landed in Philadelphia, which made it 6:00 am from where we started. Time changes are all very confusing.

The airline (which I shall not name) was very UNHELPFUL in getting us a new flight to Rome. If it was up to them, we would have been stranded in Philadelphia for at least three days, and possibly longer, as the only thing they could  offer us was stand-by status on a flight already overbooked by seven passengers leaving later that week. That meant that nine people had to suddenly decide to forgo their trip to Rome if we had any hopes of making that flight. Oh, and by the way, no hotel was offered while we were stranded. Gotta love that.

I’m really going to make a wonderfully long story short by jumping to the chase. With dogged determination and persistence I was able to secure a flight on another airline, flying out of New York for later that same day. All I had to do was get us there by our own means, which included a tram ride into Philadelphia, a train ride into New York and a taxi ride to the airport. And I only had about $20.00 US in my wallet, along with lots of euros. Thank God for plastic.

Well, I did what had to be done. I got us to New York  only 40 minutes before the plane was scheduled to take off. We got on that plane and net result, we only lost one day of vacation in Rome, but we gained one hell of an amazing-race type of adventure getting there. Memories, priceless. And thank the travel gods for travel insurance.

Instead of having an experience that could have been judged as really bad, it all turned out alright. Because I was willing to take risks, I have some of my most cherished memories of traveling with my teenage daughter. She was a real trooper through it all.

So what does this have to do with Romance. I believe that finding romance and having a really great relationship is the greatest risk of all. We may find ourselves detoured along the way, but if we keep going we will find our rainbows end. And the memories from along the way are priceless.

Now it’s your turn to share.

Enjoy always, T

Summer Solstice 2011

I love this day. It’s June 21st, the summer solstice, the longest day of the year. We get a few more moments of daylight. The sun rises just a wee bit earlier and sets just a wee bit later. I love the sunshine, and thankfully here in Northern California we’re finally getting warm days. San Francisco has been in the 70’s,  with the inland areas reaching into the 100’s. Some may say the days are too warm, but after months of extended rain I’m ready for the sun and heat.

So what else makes the summer solstice so special for me. I like the idea of more. More daylight, more sun, more of an indication that summer is finally here, and more time for romance. It’s all those things we associate with romance; long walks on the beach, moonlight strolls, candlelight, and lots of skin showing as the sweaters come off and the shorts go on. It’s all good.

And that’s what my writing is all about. I love romance. I love reading about it, writing about it, and experiencing it. I look forward to sharing my thoughts and writing with you.

Oh, and by the way, my soon to be released novel, Return In Time, uses the summer solstice as the magical day when my heroine begins her magical journey through time. Yes, it’s all so magical.

Enjoy always.

Taking Risks

The greatest risk is the risk not taken. Or, to put it another way, often the greatest risk is to take no risk at all. To play it safe and take no risks translates into dull, boring and a life not well lived, not fully experienced.

Imagine never taking your first step, your first class, or your first job interview. Imagine never riding on a roller coaster, or even doing something as everyday as learning how to drive a car. There are risks to driving a car, accidents do happen. Just listen to the traffic reports during morning commute hours. And yet, it’s a daily undertaking for most people. Risks feel scary. Ask any parent who has sat in the passenger seat while their teenage child takes control of the wheel.

When we take risks we expand our experiences. I know what it feels like to sit in the comfort of my home and read an book about travel to Europe, but how does it FEEL to actually take the necessary steps to board a plane and fly half-way across the world? What does it mean to land in a foreign country where people have a different culture, different food and may speak a different language? It’s a risk, but it’s also an experience rich with possibilities.

Or the risk of falling in love. Now that’s a grand and glorious risk. It can contain the highest highs and the lowest lows. What else in our emotional experience presents as many opportunities for risk, success or failure.

I have come to believe that there are no bad experiences and conversely, there are no good experiences. Experiences just are. It’s our perception of them that judges them to be bad or good.

I’m sure you could come up with a number of examples where the risk you took, and the experience you had, was not at all what you expected.  What may have seemed bad at the time, may have become oh so good when viewed through the lens of time. Time lets us look back and enjoy.

Enjoy now, enjoy always.

Hello world!

I’m Tricia Linden and I write romance. Paranormal, metaphysical, spiritual romance. Why? Because I like it.

I write about Romance and the Alchemy of Intimacy.  The dictionary definition of alchemy is; 1. a medieval chemical and speculative philosophy seeking to achieve the transmutation of base metals into gold – and the discovery of a means of indefinitely prolonging life, 2. any magical power or process of transmuting something common into something special.

I defiantly like the idea of transmuting something common (romance is everywhere, if you only look) into something special.

I believe romance writers use their creative powers to take everyday love stories and transmute them into something special. Hopefully my stories allow readers to believe they have reached across time and space to find a higher plain. It’s my greatest hope that through my stories you’ll imagine everlasting love (HEA) and enjoy the journey along the way.

If you can enjoy now, you can enjoy always.

Enjoy always.