TRUST in a relationship is huge.
TRUST is akin to Believing.
Have you ever felt someone’s trust? Completely?
Have you ever given someone your trust? Completely?
Can you take a moment to even imagine what that feels like?
It’s like believing in Santa Claus, or perhaps we’ll call it the spirit of Christmas. We believe good things will happen. And they do.
While they are not one and the same, trust involves unconditional love and unconditional love involves trust. Imagine saying to someone; “I trust you” instead of saying “I love you.”
What would it mean to say I trust you? Instead of thinking – I trust that you won’t hurt me, try thinking – I trust there’s nothing you can do that will hurt me.
OMG, not true, not true you shout….. Or excuse me, what did you just say?
I trust that there’s nothing you can do that will hurt me, because what trust really means is that I’m strong enough, all on my own, to love you regardless of what you think, do or say. Powerful stuff.
Think of a little baby, sweet, innocent and completely lovable. We love that little baby, unconditionally. We do not believe that baby has any intention of ‘hurting’ us. It can poop, cry, scream or smile and coo and we believe that baby is perfect. He or she is being a perfect little baby, doing the only thing it knows how to do. We trust that baby to be the best baby it can be.
But we’re grownups here. Let me use a cliché example and hope you can see the bigger picture. Imagine a man and a women, a couple, together somewhere. You get to imagine the setting and scene. A beautiful woman walks by and the man checks her out. Noticeably checks her out. You know, the whole eyes locked and following her every move checking her out. He doesn’t try to hide his appreciation of her beauty. How will the woman he’s with react?
IF she trusts that he loves her and feels safe in their relationship she will trust and accept that his ogle (appreciation of the other woman’s beauty) is just that, an ogle and nothing more.
When we’re in a relationship we don’t suddenly put blinders on and no longer see the rest of the world, nor should we. I do NOT believe I should stop looking at attractive men (or women) because I’m in a relationship. Thankfully I know my partner (my lover) is well aware that while I may look, I have no desire to touch. I’m perfectly happy with my lover and I’m not going anywhere. And if I can give him that same trust – oh what a beautiful gift we both share.
And, if your mate does look and want to touch – go read this post. Because being in love does not mean letting someone step on you.
Besides, Why in the world would you want to be with someone who doesn’t want to be with you? Please, let me know if you have a good answer to that one.
TRUST. When you have it, you let go of fear.
Believe and happy holidays.
Enjoy always, T