Blog Archives

Doing my best, as best I can.

I’ve recently sent off my manuscript for Moonlight Dreams to an editor I like and admire. I’m hoping it will be well received. Hell, I’m hoping she loves it so much she wants to pee her pants.

But then, I took another look at it, again, and I’ve found ten (or twenty!) errors. You know, little things like misspelled words, typos and such, and I think Crap, Crap, Crap, why did I do that?

And then I sit back, take a deep breath – to keep for throwing up – and remind myself that what’s done is done. And it all okay. God still loves me, even if no one else does, TYG.

If the editor likes the story enough, she’ll want to work with me. If she doesn’t (like the story) the lack of those ten (or twenty) typos isn’t going to change her mind. At least  I hope not.

I mean, really, if the likeability of my story rests on the absence of any and all typos, I’m toast, or perhaps moldy old Swiss cheese, turning green and full of holes. Woe unto me.

But! If she really likes my story, and can get past my tendency to make a few mistakes, (God bless my human soul) then we’re golden. Every day I get up and try to do my best. Some days are way better than others. Some are like sucking lard through a straw. Some days I shine. And every day is another chance to try and do my best. Not Mark Twain’s best, or Suzanne Brockmann’s, or Monica McCarthy’s, or so&so XXX’s best,  [fill in blank with your favorite and bestest author].  I can only do my best.

And if I love myself and the world around me – the world will love me back. So here’s to loving me and loving you. Cheers and Enjoy always, T

Books are my Friends.

Books are my friends. They can be your friends too.

I’ve had a lifelong friendship with books. It can be said, I LEA books. Sometimes it’s a love affair and sometimes it’s a challenge, but always, it’s engaging.  My mom was an avid reader and she passed the gene on to me. I didn’t get her cooking gene, just ask my kids, but I do read.

As a lover of words, I appreciate when they are used to tell a good story. The careful and thoughtful presentation of words contained within a book can create wondrous worlds to explore.  My books are my friends, and we often go exploring together. I have traveled far and wide, through time and space, to places real and imagined, with powerful paper wings.

Books have the power to comfort, entertain, enlighten, educate and seduce. (I’m a big fan of that seduce thing.) They can provide insight and inspire as their pages flip through my fingers in a fanciful dance of imagination.

It may sound trite or cliché to say that there have been times when a single book has changed my life and the way I look at the world around me, but it’s true. In 1999 I read Conversations with God by Neal Donald Walsh and it changed my life, thank you God. I think it’s awe inspiring to experience the magic of words presented by a distant stranger who has suddenly become a comforting friend through their sharing of words.

I have boxes of books just waiting for me in my TBR (to be read) pile, each calling to me – ‘pick me, pick me next’. As much as I enjoy the new technology of the ereader, I will never lose my love of books. Besides, they also make great door stops and paper weights. How practical and pragmatic of them.

So, tell me, how has your life been affected by books? Good, bad, or indifferent? Do you have a friendship, a love affair or a love/hate relationship? Whatever your choice, I hope you…. Enjoy Always, T

The Romance of Travel, close to home.

A couple of weeks ago, my beau and I took a trip to Southern California to attend a big family party for his aunt’s 75th birthday. Yeah auntie Barbara and Happy Birthday. While there I got to have lunch with my very fine son, which was a fabulous bonus to the trip. It was a warm sunny day and we went down to Second Street in Long Beach. Lovely day near the beach, good food, great company, who could ask for anything more? I even had a short time to visit with my lovely older sister. (You’re looking good, sis.)

For various work related reasons we were in Southern California for less than 24 hours. It takes about six hours to drive there from the San Francisco Bay Area where I live, so it’s reasonable to ask; why go so far for such a short visit. Answer; Because it was worth it.

It’s not about quantity, it’s about quality.

On the way home we stopped at Harris Ranch along I5. I’ve always wanted to go there but have always passed it by in favor of trying to get home as fast as possible on that long, straight stretch of interstate highway, but this time we stopped, and I’m glad we did.

We left early Sunday morning and we stopped at Harris Ranch for a late breakfast. The place is all about good ole cowboy charm and big steaks. Since it was breakfast, I passed on the steaks. Instead, I had something else that is a specialty on their menu, almond pancakes. Yummers, they were good. I only had the short stack and it was still too much to eat, but every mouth full was delightful.

My beau and I decided we would ‘pretend’ that our short turn-around trip was actually an exciting get-away to a far away land. We had fun going to a place I have not been to before and eating the ‘local’ food. It was very much like when we really do travel to far away places, like Europe, only in our own backyard (so to speak). The trip felt special, and it was – because Perception is reality and Attitude is everything.

It’s all about what’s in your heart that counts. When you change the way you look at things, the things you look at change. Instead of looking at this trip as too short, draining, a lot of driving time for a little fun time we choose to look at the trip as a great way to spend time together before beau went away on a business trip for a long week. We choose to see the trip as an opportunity to see friends and family and to try new things. We used the trip to try something new as if we were visitors from some far off place, new to this area, and experiencing it for the first time.

And you know what happened?  We laughed, we played, and we had fun.

May you find ways to bring fun and romance into everyday (or almost everyday) of your life. May you enjoy NOW, because if you can enjoy now, you can Enjoy Always. …. T

And have fun.

I’m not giving up Chocolate.

Ah, the romance of self-sacrifice! The idea that we would give of ourselves to become a better person for ourselves and for others. Yes, a romantic idea indeed.

Yesterday was Ash Wednesday, the first day of Lent in many Christian religions. I was raised as a Catholic and for years I have followed the annual Lenten ritual of giving up something for Lent, the 46 days preceding Easter. (It’s only 40 if you don’t count Sundays!) 

While I’m no longer a ‘practicing Catholic’ I still observe Lent. It’s somewhat of a holdover from my traditional Catholic upbringing, but now I make the effort more to satisfy my personal preferences rather than to comply with religious tenets. I appreciate the idea of that I can choose to ‘give something up’ as a demonstration of my own willpower over the choices I make. I like to muster the determination needed to make a commitment and see it through to the end. It requires that every day I be aware of my choices.

For years I’ve given up liquor and chocolate, but not this year. This year I’ll continue to give up liquor – it’s not like I’m a really big drinker – but instead of chocolate, I’m giving up cakes, cookies and pastries. I know I could give up the chocolates, I’ve done it before, many times and I’m certain I could do it again, should I so desire. But I’ve never tried to do the cakes, cookies and pastries thing before, and this year I wanted to do something different. At least that’s what I tell myself.

I’m sure it has nothing to do with the BIG box of chocolates sitting at home in my cupboard. At least that’s what I’m telling myself.

Anyone else out there who still observes the Lenten ritual of self-sacrifice? Just asking.

Enjoy always, T

Occupy this.

I’m taking a break from the subject of romance, and other things to bring you this interesting perspective on the Occupy Movement. I couldn’t have said it better myself, so I’ll let Marybeth Hicks say it for me. Thank you and take it away Marybeth…

Finally, someone has explained the “occupy protest.” And very well. 

A great article by  Marybeth Hicks.

Call it an occupational hazard, but I can’t look at the Occupy Wall Street protesters without thinking, “Who parented these people?”

As a culture columnist, I’ve commented on the social and political ramifications of the  “movement” – now known as “OWS” – whose fairyland agenda can be summarized by one of their placards: “Everything for everybody.”

Thanks to their pipe-dream platform, it’s clear there are people with serious designs on  “transformational” change in America who are using the protesters like bedsprings in a brothel.

Yet it’s not my role as a commentator that prompts my parenting question, but rather the fact that I’m the mother of four teens and young adults.  There are some crucial life lessons that the protesters’ moms clearly have not passed along.

Here, then, are five things the OWS protesters’ mothers should have taught their children but obviously didn’t, so I will:

* Life isn’t fair. The concept of justice – that everyone should be treated fairly – is a worthy and worthwhile moral imperative

on which our nation was founded.  But justice and economic equality are not the same. Or, as Mick Jagger said,
“You can’t always get what you want.”No matter how you try to “level the playing field,” some people have better luck, skills, talents or connections that land them in better places. Some seem to have  all the advantages in life but squander them, others play the modest hand they’re dealt and make up the difference in hard work and perseverance, and some find jobs on Wall Street and eventually buy houses in the  Hamptons .  Is it fair?  Stupid question.
* Nothing is “free.”  Protesting with signs that seek “free” college degrees and “free” health care make you look like idiots, because colleges and hospitals don’t operate on rainbows and sunshine.  There is no magic money machine to tap for your meandering educational careers and “slow paths” to adulthood, and the 53 percent of taxpaying Americans owe you neither a degree nor an annual physical.While I’m pointing out this obvious fact, here are a few other things that are not free: overtime for police officers and municipal workers, trash hauling, repairs to fixtures and property, condoms, Band-Aids and the food that inexplicably appears on the tables in your makeshift protest kitchens.  Real  people with real dollars are underwriting your civic temper tantrum.

* Your word is your bond.  When you demonstrate to eliminate student loan debt, you are  advocating precisely the lack of integrity you decry in others.  Loans are made based on solemn promises to repay them. No one forces you to borrow money; you are free to choose educational pursuits that don’t require loans, or to seek technical or vocational training that allows you to support yourself and your ongoing educational goals. Also, for the record, being a college student is not a state of victimization. It’s a privilege that billions of young people around the globe would die for – literally.

* A protest is not a party. On Saturday in New York , while making a mad dash from my cab to the door of my hotel to avoid you, I saw what isn’t evident in the newsreel footage of your demonstrations: Most of you are doing this only for attention and fun. Serious people in a sober pursuit of social and political change don’t dance jigs down Sixth  Avenue like attendees of a Renaissance festival. You look foolish, you smell gross, you are clearly high and you don’t seem to realize that all around you are people who deem you irrelevant.

* There are  reasons you haven’t found jobs.

The truth? Your tattooed necks, gauged ears, facial piercings and dirty dreadlocks are off-putting. Nonconformity for the  sake of nonconformity isn’t a virtue. Occupy reality: Only 4 percent of  college graduates are out of work. If you are among that 4 percent, find a  mirror and face the problem. It’s not them. It’s you.
Marybeth Hicks is a weekly columnist for the The Washington Times and editor of Family Events, a weekly e-newsletter and blog site for women from the publishers of Human Events. She is the author of Don’t Let the Kids Drink the Kool-Aid: Confronting the Left’s Assault on Our Families, Faith, and Freedom (Regnery Publishers, 2011), Bringing up GEEKS: How to Protect Your Kid’s Childhood in a Grow-up-too-fast World (Penguin/Berkley, 2008) and The Perfect World Inside My Minivan–One Mom’s Journey Throu gh the Streets of Suburbia (Faith Publishing, 2006).
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