Category Archives: Relationships

How She met her Lover – story #1 of many.

This is a little story I heard recently in response to my often asked question: How did you meet your Lover?

Jenny had gone to a local bar with her sister and some friends to celebrate her sister’s recent promotion at work. She wasn’t much of a regular attendee at bars and this night she ended up drinking a club soda and sitting a bit apart from her sister, who was getting a bit too drunk, but who can blame her it was her celebration.

Jenny was sitting at one of those taller bar tables where you have to sit on a bar stool, not a regular table, when she took note of a man sitting down on the bar stool next to her. She took note that he was a rather nice looking man, but other than that she paid him no attention. After all, she was suppose to be there with her sister and while she was single, she wasn’t on the lookout for a new man in her life. Well, you know what they say about when you’re not looking.

Soon after the man took a seat next to her, she heard him being greeting by another man, apparently one of his buddies.

Buddy asked Man sitting next to Jenny; “So who’s your friend?”

Man sitting next to Jenny answered; “I don’t know her and I don’t think she want’s to know me.”

This, of course, intrigued Jenny. Without a moment of hesitation she turned to the Man sitting next to her and asked, “Why would you say that?”

Looking a little chagrin to have been overheard, the Man sitting next to Jenny said, “Because you’ve ignored me since I sat down.”

Jenny chuckled, “That doesn’t mean I don’t want to know you. It only means I didn’t make an effort to strike up a conversation with you. Just because you took a seat next to me doesn’t mean I have to talk to you.” But even as she said that, she knew it would have been a nice and polite thing to do.

Which he quickly pointed out by saying, “But if you DID want to know me, wouldn’t you have made the effort?”

Of course, he also could have started a conversation with her, but he hadn’t.

Jenny said, “Maybe I didn’t say anything because I’m shy.” Which of course wasn’t’ true, as demonstrated by her ability to easily jump in to his conversation with his buddy.

Man next to her said, “Well, are you?”

Jenny asked, “Am I what? Shy?”

“No, interested in getting to know me?” Man said.

Well, now Jenny had a problem. She could either admit she had no interest in meeting the Man sitting next to her, (which seemed rude) or she could claim that yes, she wanted to know all about him. Feeling frisky and up for the challenge, she opted to go with the latter option to see where it would lead. Besides,she figured if things turned sour, she could always go in search of her sister to dump the guy. (Harsh, but true.)

Jenny soon learned that Man sitting next to her was named Bob, and they spent the next hour discussing the merits of mating rituals conducted at bars, among other such topics. Jenny had a grand time, Bob made her laugh, always a good sign, and they had such a good time that before the evening was over, they exchanged contact info. They then arranged to meet again for dinner to continue their intense conversation, and they soon discovered in each other someone they wanted to get to know better.

Several months later they’re still having intense conversations and are well on their way to happily ever after, or where ever else their romantic journey may take them.

So how did Jenny met her lover?

She ignored him until he got her attention.

Enjoy always, T

V Day, It’s not just for lovers!

Today is Valentine’s Day. It’s the day we celebrate romance and relationships.

All relationships.

Come on folks, let’s be inclusive. Let’s not just celebrate romantic relationships, let’s celebrate all relationships.  Let’s celebrate our girl friends, our boy friends and those family members we actually like.  And while we’re at it we can throw in a few neighbors and some co-workers. These are all included in our relationships, they all have value, and they are all worthy of being celebrated.

All relationships provide the Alchemy of Intimacy. I know, for some it’s more than others, and that’s a good thing, but everyone in our lives brings us value. And, we in return, bring value to everyone we know. Yes, we (you) do.

Remember when you were in grade school and you pretty much had to give a Valentine to very one in your class? Good idea, right. No one was left out. Imagine being like that again. Imagine giving a special message of appreciation – one that says; You’re Special – to all your friends and family, not just your significant other.

Even if you don’t happen to have a love of your life  in your life at the moment – you can still show your love of life.   And Have Fun.

 Enjoy Always, T

Stories and Relationships.

Every story ever told is about relationships.

Maybe not about male/female romantic relationships but there is always some kind of relationship in every story. It may be a business relationship, friends,  parent/child, criminal/victim/detective, old man and the sea, and the list goes on and on. But there’s always a relationship, someone is relating to someone else (or something else, like a big whale), because that’s how we go through life; relating to the world around us.

I believe the best relationships are the honest and mutually beneficial relationship. The one’s that create Critical MASS, Mutual Acceptance & Support Systems. Without Mutual Acceptance & Support we have anarchy, dominance and overbearing control…. I think you get the idea that those are less than ideal relationships.

Mutual Acceptance and Support means; I Accept who you are and that you’re doing the best you can (given who you are) and I Support your efforts to be the best you can be. I have a note on my computer at work that reminds me “I’m doing the best I can, given who I am.” It helps when I’m tempted to think I’m not getting it all done.

If we look for the good, we’ll find the good, we’ll see the beauty and open ourselves to seeing more. Even our troubles, set-backs and disappointments are full of beauty. When seen from a distance we can see the lessons to be learned and the life to be lived.

Stories – and life – are all about relationships. So next time, if I ask you, how you doing? or Heard any good stories lately, be sure to tell me about your ‘latest relationship’, because inquiring minds want to know!

Enjoy always, T

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